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Cez Ramirez
04 September 2016 @ 06:10 pm

I will be back and will be sensational...

Cez Ramirez
11 May 2013 @ 04:28 pm
Well 'aló there.

Sorry for being off for too long. I'd say it was because of being busy but I'd be lying you dears.

So, It's been a while, isn't it? I know...Well, I guess you'll be glad to know I am still alive and kicking, still unemployable, but I swear I'm working on that LOL. I BLOODY SWEAR IT. Anyway, This time I came back because I just feel kinda inspired to write more about my random shitty living, now that I'm in the middle of a Sunday night breakdown. Yup, here's still Sunday and there wasn't anything to do except stay in home all day lying on the bed checking twitter for something important or interesting but nothing. Oh dear... LOL

My mood is quite well, let me tell ya. I'm feeling the blue but not as the usual suicide blue I tend to feel, maybe is because I'm writing to you today dears. Let's smile for a while :)
Uhm.... I was moving a little, just a little, with those guys from MtyRock, they're quite cool but I think I'm getting pissed off cuz I'm doing a job for free, and I'm doing a great job although they've just sent me to only two events since i joined meanwhile the rest of the crew have covered like 10 or more events HA! but it helps me yeah for portfolio but, .... I think it's enough. I think my portfolio finally shows some things I can do about what I want, look: http://behance.net/cezramirez

Cool, uh?

Well, what else? ....I'm still in my plan about ignoring everybody out because, honestly, I just don't feel like talking with anyone. No, I'm better off alone with no social interaction with my friends, I don't want to talk to them for now. Ok Actually, I talked with Estefania a few weeks ago...mm.... a tiny chat, but we chatted.

Twitter is a cute place to stay by the moment. Yes it is. For me. Only, for me hahaha. I met more soulmates which is cool because I'm meeting a new circle of Soulmates, the Mexican ones, which is cooler because I don't know more people from my country who listens to Placebo so, it's okay.
Also, today I've been unfollowed by Marvin & Joyride magazines and I don't know what to think about it, I pissed them off with my random writing, it's fun actually but, in part I felt I lost a valuable contact or something. Dunno hahaha.

Oh, I know what we're gonna talk today: I'm in love. Don't be scared, it's not with a real person....well, yes it is, I mean, he does exist but he is...how can I say it? unreachable? .. I just met Noel Fielding's world.
It''s a twisted world, gotta say, but very amazing. Do you remember when I watched him on NMTB and I said "I don't ever gonna fall in love with him no matter how cool and interesting he is", well, that's bullshit. I totally fell :) .... it's just, omg you need to see his work, I like him as artist, he has a very wicked mind and i love that. And as comedian he is sooooo wonderful, I really love this guy, he's a nice piece of ass :B
So as I'm being an obsessed I already watched most of the shows where he has a role.
I'm desperately wishing his book for my birthday!

In other news, I found Iwan Rheon is a musician too and he sings so beautiful! interesting :9 this is his song "Ar Dan" which is my favorite tune at the moment, and my current song -as you can see. :)

So beautiful.
Current Mood: boredbored
Current Music: "Ar Dan" - Iwan Rheon
Cez Ramirez
07 January 2013 @ 12:07 am

YES, we met because of Placebo haha.

It’s so beautiful when people from the past remember me. I have this friend of mine, Sandra, I met her in a Cebo forum and she was the most wonderful person I’ve met then, we were good friends. I haven’t talked with her in like, 5 YEARS, because to be honest, timezones wer alway a barrier between us (she in Italy, me in Mexico) but the times we talked were the most amazing times ever. Time passed and…I dunno, I guess our lives changed and things happened to both and you know, we just moved away with out respective lives, one day we just talked and after that, I didn’t know about her anymore, we lost touch. So, yesterday I could (finally) recover my old email adress because it was hacked and shit :/, so I decided to send her an email asking if she remembered me or something….and omg I felt so happy because she replied me and said she felt happy because I emailed her :”) and everything was so cute! We didn’t talk too much because we’re both kinda busy at the moment, but we promised to stay in touch in the next weeks.

Omg I have so much to tell her, about my music, college, my life, my everything! Can’t wait to talk to her again. I found my Sandra #1…she’s “Sandra #1” because she’s the first Sandra in my life lol. (To be honest, there are like, 6 Sandras in my life.. lol) :))

Note to self: I think everyday I feel more secure about doing my only resolution  for this year To be back in touch with people I loved in the past. Good friends from the past.



Current Mood: happyhappy
Current Music: Elbow - Grounds For Divorce
Cez Ramirez
05 January 2013 @ 12:14 pm
^ Theeere you go, a Matt Smith/Doctor Who hello to start the year.Collapse )Okay :)...

Today, five years ago, I created this blog running away from my old one semiotic_heart.
Btw, I've just logged in just by curious and I saw a person commented one of my entries there and said he/she liked the way I used to blog in there :/...so, NOW, I'm seriously thinking about bringing back my old way of blogging HERECollapse )
Current Mood: cheerfulcheerful
Current Music: Absolute Radio (sorry, sometimes my AR player doesn't update at all, so I dunno who's the song played right now ._. )
Cez Ramirez
30 December 2012 @ 12:13 am

Holy f*ck! The bad thing about MacBook Pros during winter is that they feel fucking cold!! D: *brrrrr* ..anyway. I feel like writing something non interesting today, but I want to because I don’t know lol.
Okay, didn’t tell you in my last entry but, I finally watched the Doctor Who Christmas special: The Snowmen. So, let me enlighten you my dears, with this cute review written by moi: ***REVIEW**

Today I finally watched Shallow Grave. And I have to say oh my dear fuck! I loved Chris Eccleston’s acting. It’s a very amazing movie. I highly recommend it. REVIEW 2*

Hmm yup, today I feel like a movie/TV critic hahahaha. I hope you liked my reviews :P.

In music news, there’s still new and old music to keep listening! My music queue is way long! I recently got Pet Shop Boys discography and Kylie Minogue’s! besides the musi I already have but haven’t listened yet, like the new The Darkness record, some tunes by The Streets (oh I loved them <3 ), old music by Stereophonics, Elbow, Embrace, Snow Patrol last album, and more and more beautiful melodies. :)

I’m coming to the end of my official vacations, from 1st of January I’ll be really really worried about getting a REAL JOB AS PHOTOGRAPHER. I already have some new information and new options too, I’ll offer my ass with some music magazines and see what happens. And I’m still a little undecided if going to the Press Department of Uni (the same place where I did my survey) and ask for a job. *sigh* guys, actually, I wouldn’t like to return to that place because I’d feel -ok no, I’D BE!- stocked in one single position as photographer for the Principal of Uni and cultural events like book introductions and some good stuff I actually like, like some university musical events… but the problem is, that’s not what I really want for my life, I mean, I want to be fucking music photographer, not only a press photographer, but I think I need a backup job too! But if I get the “backup job”, I’d be too busy with it at the point of find myself forced to abandon for a while my real goal if I want easy money to save the enough to go to London. If I go for the job in Press of Uni,y my only choice to be music photographer would be with the local magazine FOR FREE! And c’mon! I don’t want to make a cool work for free! Maybe sounds good by a hand because it means I’d have enough work for a great portfolio but believe me, in my only job with them I think I made a decent one because I photographed lots of bands, so, my portfolio doesn’t look as amateur in that side… *sigh*. I’m still confused about it .:(

What a dilemma!

I have to much music to listen, and I’m starting right now…

Current Mood: creativecreative
Current Music: Pet Shop Boys - West End Girls
Cez Ramirez
Hello again. Lot of things have happened since the last time, good times and bad times are being left in the past, and new experiencies are invading my world right now. But let me enlighten you all:

Last week was madness! My degree ceremony occurred,FINALLYCollapse )

I felt so touched and happy because my life as student has come to an end. A very long chapter of my life was closed. I still remember six years ago when I arrived to this city to start my high school...lots of good and bad memories and stories, a few friends, lots of separated ways. And then it's college, there were good times and bad times in college, hard works, deal with difficult people, parties, awful teachers, amazing teachers, love, failing, stress etc etc etc. But even with the memories, college is where I can lovely say I met the best people in the world, I take with seven amazing friends and soulmates whom I hope to be for the rest of my life with. I love them so much. Even when I said I felt abbandoned by them. At the end they're there, they've been always there.
Which takes me to one point, I'm not going to say I was the villain making the emo drama queen role, because I wasn't. but, something that I learned was appraise more my friendships. Sometimes loneliness is a strong feeling and you feel you can't deal with it and you start to avoid everybody around, but if only you give them a second, you will love the huuuuuge quantity of smiles they can take away from you. Also, I0m so thankful with my family, my sweet brother and my mother, who have been always there supporting me in any good and bad situation, only they know how much I suffered to arrive here. All the bad stuff we lived together and so there's no words enough to say thanks for being there for me. And finally you'll meet them. Dears, they are Thelma, Estefania, Melissa and Miguel. I LOVE YOU DEARS!! <3Collapse )
Wow. In other news, now I'm a lazy ass in home with all the free time of the world. Now I have no excuse to stay home (my mom will force me to get outta the house ugh), but just as fun, I created some freelance work for me: I need to upload more photos to portfolio, I have a few ones about concerts. AAaaand also, I'll re-edit a video I delivered as final school project due Arts & Media class. it's an animation in which the 90% of it is about motion tracking and, honestly, the tracking in it sucks! hahhaa so I'm gonna perfect it. And then upload it, and show it, and see where the hell I can send it...y'know, animation film festivals and shits :). I can't wait!

Concerts! Yes! i mentioned concerts. Let me tell you something I did this week. It supposes my original plan was not to worry during December and I'd like to know in what moment of my life did I forgot that plan ._. . Last monday I saw a publication by a local online magazine looking for contributors. Also is where Thelma is contributing right now btw. It's a job with no paid. and I don't fucking know WHY I offered them my services as photographer and they accepted me, my necessity betrayed me. So, next Saturday I'll have my first event. It's a kind of rock party, which is great because the job is about music photography so this will help me to create some artwork about music photography and then I'll be able to promote my work with the main event organizations of the country, aka great leagues hahahaha.

Hmm what else? Oh yeah, considering all the free time I'll have for now, I'm already updating my ass with series. I finished of download "Hot in Cleveland" and I'm in the middle of downloading the 4th season of Doctor Who <3. There's so much to watch right now!!! AND AAAAND, also, I watched this old series where Andrew Scott plays a cute dork guy with Kris Marshall, My Life in Film. It's only six episodes and I've just watched three. I'm looking for some subs files but aaargh is just so damn difficutl to find them :/. Oh well. My serie hunting won't stop for now, because at by the moment I'm looking for series starring Benedict Cumberbatch and/or Rupert Graves. Oooh so much good stuff to come :D

Note to self: Talk with Jacquie again. We have so much to fangirl over about :')).

Wow, that's all for now. I promise to come back with some new shitty stuff about my life. Feel free to comment or send me messages about random talking. Oh my Molko! An entry without talking about Placebo...oh boy u.u

Read ya! :)
Current Mood: lovedloved
Cez Ramirez
26 October 2012 @ 03:44 pm
I'm not being a good pal'.

Today after class I met with Melissa and Estefania and we took the bus together. Mel told me she was going to her work to vacate, she was fed up of going everyday and do the monotonous stuff she used to do. In the road I was thinking if that would be a good idea for her. I mean, she grew up, she made a life in her job and she just say she quit. Anyway, she also told me she was going to search for another one in other place. During the conversation they were agreed about they don't wanted to be in the same job forever or for a long time, which is kinda interesting because they were gaining so good money. Oh well. As things are today I doubt she can find a job quick, I mean, to survive the lonesome days. I don't know, I think I prefer to first search the "other job" and then quit the actual job...dunno. I doubt if she can survive withut a job now, she just talked about it all the time. Now what can she talk about? I die to know. 

After the long talking about her, she asked me "how I was?", *sigh*....as if she really care. Considering all the bitterness around me, I talked about how shitty my days are being at the moment, how I feel like dying everyday, how my experimental production class is, how the teacher makes me feel, ALMOST everything. Estefania couldn't believe it, and Mel just said "I feel worried about you". These words have been in my head all the morning. Till what point is she worried? I mean, she's young, beautiful, happy person so how uninteresting her life could be as to have time and interest about worry about a person like me. To be honest, I didn't believe her when she told me that, I know it's something people says in these cases. They lie, they lie all the time. I mean, until what point a person can worry about another person who treat you like shit? I'm not being a good pal' since....wow, months, maybe? My lonesome feeling is as strong than I can't bear anyone near me!

Which takes me to Thelma. I think she stopped being my survival companion a time ago. We've been apart one each other. We cannot even walk together anymore after the hell class. It sucks. Or at least in the past, now I don't care. 

In some moment they left and I continued the road alone. I went to the city center, or near from the city center. Talking about shitty EP class, I needed to attend some bussiness related to it. I went to Casa del Libro to ask for permission to record one of their events of the weekend. When I arrived I was attended by a girl in the lobby who randomly recognized me from the Arrecife event. aww I felt so important for being "recognized",

girl: "hi...hey! are you the girl who was taking pictures during the intro of Arrecife book?
Me: "Uhm yes".

Also, and as I was expecting, the girl of the lobby sent me with Tere! and omg she remembered me! I felt so happy to see her and she was...blessed (?) to see me too. I dunno but, I felt I was talking with some friend. I was interested (VERY interested) about record a child's event, but at the end I finished according with Tere just record an event this sunday: another book introduction. She told she will help me with it because I need to do some interviews and more stuff. Sigh, a hard weekend is coming for me. Love it.

As I had so much free time, I went to the mall near from school to buy the new Muse album. YES, I'm spending the money I don't have in things I don't need...okay yeah i need it. Yes I do. It cost $200 pesos...so yeah I ended with no money to buy something TO EAT. Now I'm starving. Now that I'm talking about money and CD's, lookie what I bought last friday:


 And obviously, already listened it. I liked all the songs but my favorite one is "The Extra". I'm happy because it didn't disappoint me. It happens that I was waiting for it since the BFTS era, when in the making of video appeared a shot of Brian composing it. From then it sounded very interesting for me and I was oh so dying to hear it. I finally did, and it's so bloody amazing.

Sigh. I'm tired of everything around....you know, I've been thinking lately about what the hell am I tired, maybe I can write about it next time. Just let me, order my head.
Current Mood: accomplishedaccomplished
Cez Ramirez
Long I haven't written here. I always say the same, I know. I'm sorry, but it's the true, just the true. Also, this is the part when I explain over and over again and make the same fucking promise and I just don't do it. But today I'm here, sitting at one of the most fancy Starbucks in the city, wearing the same old coat from the profile picture, and drinking a sweet and delicious latte venti with regular milk. 
It's raining outside, there's an amazing weather out there, actually, fresh, but not as to wear jackets, or an old coat. I just hope doesn't rain too much meanwhile because i have to go back school in a few hours. Two hours.

I'm growing, this is something amazing to say, but at the same time is sad. I mean, I can't be a little girl anymore...or at all. Yesterday, in school, we have a talk about degree and graduation and everything. My prom is in one month two weeks aprox. oh my god, sounds very soon, I know. I'm a little anxious for that day to come, because, you know, it's a big step in my whole life because it suppose I'm finishing a life as student. Now it's time to be an adult, to get a job, and survive by myself. Sigh... Yesterday, I was talking with my mom about it, and she told me one of her motivational speeches that almost made me cry, honestly, and it's difficult make me cry. The hardest part of it: she said she's so proud of me. 

Friends. Oh well, maybe I'm (still) not alone, but I really feel like it already happened what always happen in my life: It seems I am all alone again. I mean, during my stay in here I made friends, but I feel they all grew up before me, they got jobs, they think different, in the wrong way...they're now stupid. To be honest, I don't feel them like friends, I felt it like a companions in this road. Now it's almost time to say goodbye, it's time to fall apart. I don't know if I'll see them again, or if they remember me. I'm not saying that grow up is bad but, I don't know, I just don't feel part of them anymore. I feel them, in another planet.

The fact is, I feel so alone, I need someone with me, a friend.

In other news (happy news), because I like to let you know random facts about me, I finally bought a new computer: a MacbookPro. It's great, gotta say, I'm on the part of adding all the softwares I need to survive. Sigh. what else?..what else?...projects! This semester is being kinda shitty because of one single class that I'm living as hell: Experimental Production. Teacher makes me feel like a retard or something. I'm working with him in one of the activities of the class, it's so awkward. About Digital Illustration, I'm really enjoying it, I mean is so awesome and teacher teach us a lot about Illustrator and everything, and we do the most amazing and simples homework ever. Everything comes from our wicked minds. I'm taking another class called Arts and Media, which I gotta is so boring because is all about stuff I learned in the last four years. Anyway, so it's easy.

Music is being good lately too. This week, my favorite band **coff coff Placebo** released an EP and I already bought it in iTunes and today I went to the record store and bought it again. Sorry, I'm just a sick fan. But not as idiot as the girls form Facebook, that's fucking sick and idiot! I'll show you a picture later.
Also, you guys should know I'm uploading my portfolio more often this time because now I need promotion. So you can check me at: http://behance.net/cezramirez and admire my work, or insult me, or hire me, whatever comes first.

Ok, not bad for today, uh? I think it's already time to continue reading here because it's the only place where I can really take my demons away just to let others come in.
Current Mood: nostalgicnostalgic
Cez Ramirez
09 July 2012 @ 12:59 am

I’m all alone. I need someone to be there with me, someone who listens, someone who tell me, someone who scream at me. I want someone who really cares about me; not a lover, because I can’t love. If I respond, I’m the enemy; if I don’t, I’m a hater. If I smile, I’m hypocrite; if I don’t, I’m an asshole.

I don’t want to be with these people anymore, I want to go and never come back.

Current Mood: sadsad
Cez Ramirez

It seems boredom of my summer is just here to stay, and never leave. I’m in the very usual point of my life where I just think about all the amazing ways of commit suicide. It’s not cool, I know, but hey! Everything around me is just fucked up.

Oh! So I didn’t tell you what happened a few months ago on Facebook. It happens that I have “added” to…one of the girls from junior high. So, one day, someone tagged her on a photo aaaand OH MY BLOODY MOLKO! It was a photo from that dark times (they are DARK times for me lol) and stalking reading comments, someone asked for me, and this girl told almost everything about me…so, now they know about my existence. 

Btw, I'm the one in the circle.Collapse )

Doctor Who is my king!!Collapse )

There’s more, also, I’ve been into watch the new BBC serie, Blackout, already watched the first episode. And it's so bloody amazing! I fell in love with the story, it's a masterpiece! Chris Eccleston character is so well built. Not too much was shown about Andrew Scott's character but it seems it will be interesting as any other Andrew's actings. Fuck! I just can't wait to watch episode 2! :DD oohh gosh! It’s madness! Haha

Aaaaaaaand of course, there were Placebo news!! They collaborated with Mercedes Benz in a few concerts promoting the new Classe A car or whatever that new car is named :P. So in the last two weeks all the fandom were spamming twitter with the latest news and everything, and oooh they played a new song! A new COVER  but whatevaaa it was new material from them :3 *LINK*

And then the band joined a fashion evento also by Mercedes  

which was pretty amazing aslfklsajflsdjflkas :DCollapse )

Some surprising stuff was that in Madrid, MB played a promo video just before the concert begin. And some people on forums are ranting about they THINK HAVE SEEN Brian driving in some part of the video…uhm imo, video is not as clear so until now, I’m not seeing a driver Brian there :/.

Random.Collapse )

In more music news, Steven Wilson news! 1) Now he’s on twitter which is pretty awesome for me. I know I’ll never see personal stuff about him but hey! he’s on twitter! xD, 2) he’ll be releasing a DVD called “Get All You Deserve" next September!!! It will include 2 hour performance from the gig from Mexico City on 13th april, and a special edition will also include the show on 2 audio CDs. 

Video :DCollapse )

Omg I’m so excited! Can’t wait to get it hahaha

What else? What else?..oh yeah! I’ll go to see Linkin Park next September. They will play on MTV World Stage here in Monterrey and it’s absolutely free so…THERE I GO! And yes, I’m thinking very seriously about getting a press pass but first, let’s see how rolls everything.


Oh well, it feels nice to keep writing in here. Seems to be the only place where I can really explain how I feel. I promise to keep it alive and update my portfolio, MEGALOL I’ve said that last thing since MONTHS AGO and still nothing. But now is for real, I mean, I need to prepare my material to get a real job this time because…I’ll tell you next entry ;D.

Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: Steven Wilson - Veneno Para Las Hadas